Mean Girls

I find myself surrounded by artistic, intelligent, and opinionated women--by choice. The women in my family are capable of handling situations that I've seen others crumble under. Big Al has often told me that I let too many women "in." My friend Penny tells me that others sense "things about me" and are drawn to me. She has also told me to be careful because these "things about me" can be exploited by some. This brings me to my question. When a woman has been used by a female friend, how does she continue Marching Fourth?

Affirmations and love?

I had a friend, and we will call her V.  I met her at a former job.  I felt that she connected with me immediately.  I really wasn't sure why she connected with me because we were nothing alike.  On the other hand, I thought this was interesting.  V really wanted to get ahead in all aspects of her life.  In fact, she would often quote Louise Hay and Wayne Dyer throughout her day.  She had mantras.  V started to buy me books about healing my life and experiencing my good.  My good?  Well, why the hell not?  Can't hurt me.  She would also send at least one note a week to my home.  I thought this was endearing.  Who sends snail mail anymore?!?  Love it!

V left the company we were both working for, and she spent the next year looking for her "dream job."  Her words.  Not mine.  I was her reference.  I was her sounding board.  I was her patient listener.  Now, I am giving myself kudos here because I was a good friend.  V had always been there for me, so I was being a good friend in return.  She needed compassion.  

V got the call.  She also got the job!  She was so excited, and I was so excited for her.  It was with a large company, and it sounded like a great opportunity for her.  V was so excited that she wanted to bring me on board with her.  I resisted for months.  My goals and V's goals were never the same.  We were great friends, but again, we were also very different people.  Our values just weren't the same.  I talked about all of these things with her.  V thought that these things made us a dynamic team.  We made each other stronger.  Hmm...

I finally took the job.  There's really no eloquent way to say that the job sucked for me.  I just wasn't a good fit.   I couldn't understand why V thought I would be a good fit.  This was a great place for her, but it was like a social prison for me.  When I was told not to laugh so loud, I knew it was over.  I happen to like my laugh.  It sounds just like my grandma Goforth.  She was fabulous, and so is the laugh.  This was the end.  

I left.  It was a bit messy, and I can't get into that right now.  I have never heard from V since I walked out the door that day.  I have no closure.  I doubt V could give me any answers that would provide me with closure.  My guess is that V thinks I made her look bad and am a bad friend.  Was she one of the "others" that my friend Penny talks about?  I don't know.  

So, how do I March Fourth?  What do I do with these karmically tainted books and notes?  Burn them?  Throw them out?  Send them back?  I still haven't decided.  I will continue to seek out interesting women for friends.  I love being surrounded by females from all walks of life.  V didn't break me.  She's just a butt pothole on my journey.